Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Zombie Watch

I have to admit that I have been somewhat distracted, what with all of the training and stock piling. As a result, I don't search the news every day for a possible zombie outbreak. Sad to say, this might cost me my edge. However, I am happy to report that someone else is covering this topic, hopefully with some success and foresight.

Samexf posted a comment recently. Upon further investigation, I found that he has his own blog, encouraging the dissemination of news of possible zombie outbreaks. So check out Zombie Watch, and please report any occurances which may be zombie related. As a globally linked community we can stop the threat. So keep your eyes peeled, and please inform us (the zombie hunting community) of any potential outbreaks!

Monday, February 26, 2007

More Wintery Mix

While leaving the house today, I was very impressed with the slippery conditions. Because of my superior dexterity, I was able to keep my balance and successfully circumvent disaster. However, given the same conditions amidst a zombie invasion, our undead attackers may not fare so well. When I usually discuss the weather and how it may affect zombie movement, I tend to fixate on the cold and its effects on dead tissue. I've completely neglected the positive effect this weather might have on the zombies' complete lack of coordination.

Like all zombie defense measures, this is a double-edged sword. In keeping surfaces slippery you are risking a possible fracture, or at the very least a severe bruising. Bragging rights aside, this is a serious issue. But if you are cautious (and I recommend erring on the cautious side with all things zombie-related), this becomes a minor concern that could seriously shape the terrain to your advantage. But I would suggest getting those cleat-like grippy things that slide over your boots as a precautionary measure... not to mention the fact that they could potentially do some damage in a kicking situation.

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Birthday Wishes

Today is my birthday. I am 28. And for my birthday wish, I wished to be the best zombie hunter ever. It's corny, I know, but we all know that wishing for world peace is an effort in futility. Plus, my wish is something that I can have some hand in making come true. So here's to increased training... and hopefully getting wiser... in my growing maturity.

Thursday, February 22, 2007


One of the best things that you can do in order to prepare for the zombie menace is to make sure that your body is in the best working order before the menace rises. While I usually apply this to exercise and healthy eating it also extends to more specialized areas, such as dentistry.

Personally, I despise going to the dentist. I don't have any specific fears, or any of the normal dentist problems, I just really hate going. However, I did overcome my prejudice last Friday, and I went to the dentist. I am happy to report that my teeth are in good working order. This may not seem like a particularly tremendous accomplishment, but at least I don't have to go for another six months.

The reason things like this are important to upkeep (as much as you may hate to go to the dentist), is that you can't have the distraction of a toothache (from a neglected cavity... or whatever) when you are trying to fight for your life. Anything that will keep you healthy longer is a good thing, even if it does mean giving up an afternoon of training to have your teeth coated with a disgusting cherry-flavored paste, only to have it sprayed all over your face when it is "cleaned" off.

Monday, February 19, 2007

Guns, guns, guns

I think it's obvious after reviewing my previous posts that I tend to prefer (and speak more confidently about) close range weapons, such as bludgeons, and my all time favorite, the machete. I want to emphasize that this is not because I don't think ranged weapons are valuable. Quite the contrary, taking out the undead hordes from a distance is very preferable to close range fighting because of the lesser chance of contracting the zombie virus.

So why don't I talk more about guns? Unlike machetes and baseball bats which are quite affordable and very legal to practice with, guns are much more complicated. I simply don't have that much experience with guns. A couple of months ago I went to a gun show, and more recently I've been visiting gun stores. Judging from the talk I heard shooting back and forth, things were quite a bit more complicated than I anticipated. There are so many different types of guns, all of which have their bonuses. And the range in quality (which will affect effectiveness in the field) is huge (and reflected in the price tag). Honestly, I'm not sure if this is something that I will ever get a handle on.

And of course there is the matter of training. While I would love to spend more time at the shooting range, it is simply too expensive. Taking my practice home isn't a good idea either because the area I presently live in would seriously frown upon said activities, and I can't fight zombies from jail. So try to squeeze in training when and where I can, and at the moment I rely a lot on Justin's opinion, since he is much more versed in guns than I. I hope to eventually be more knowledgeable in this area, but I welcome any recommendations in the mean time.

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Man Vs. Wild

I found this show, Man Vs. Wild, on the Discovery Channel. The premise: this ex-military guy gets dropped into situations (such as "adandoned tourist") and he shows how to survive and conquer the wilderness. As someone with a necessary interest in survivalism, I found this show captivating. Basic skills that often evade us in our pre-apocalyptic lives, are shown in an instructive and practical manner. The episode I saw even showed how to start a fire with a stick and a piece of bark. I thought that was folklore! So here's to starting fires in my kitchen in an attempt to prepare for my post-apocalptic life on the move, in an undead urban landscape!

Advice of the Day: Buying one of those flint things that you scrape with a knife blade to create fire might not be a bad idea.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Long time, no posts

In these pre-apocalyptic times, I am always trying to push my limits, just so that when the undead rise, I will be better equipped to fight the zombie menace. Makes sense, right? However, occasionally (such as last week), I push too hard, and it has dire consequences. I gave myself an extra-strenuous workout because I wanted to see if I could still run/punch/kick after working out for a couple of hours. I found that I could, in fact, push myself past exhaustion and still fight (albeit with a punching bag). I expected to be sore later, a feeling that I find rewarding because I know it is the feeling of building muscle. Unfortunately in my weakened state, perhaps as a combination of the weather and other stresses, I got sick.

I think I got a cold or maybe the flu (though I still stand by my feelings towards flu shots). I was laid up for two days, and am still recovering. Zombies better not strike tonight, because I'm not at my full braining potential. No doubt, I could still fight my way through hordes of the undead, but there would be boogers everywhere.

So, in conclusion, I have learned the value of incremental increases in my training. I want to be able to do a six-hour brain-a-thon-with-cricket-bat some day, but today is not that day.

Monday, February 05, 2007

Morbidity and buttons

Regarding the last post.
Reflections on death are not morbid, nor should it take a cannibalistic army of the undead to cause you to reflect on your death, and by extrapolation, your life. These are consequences of our existence which should not be taken for granted; not simply because the zombie menace may not rise during your lifetime, but simply because our existence should have purpose with or without the undead motivator.
I still need to do some more thinking on this topic because I can't make my words express my thoughts...

In an unrelated event, I've started wearing my button with the Zombie Defense logo (the severed arm crossed with the machete) in a more prominent location. This button, perhaps because of it's ambiguity, has proven to be a much better conversation starter than the "Ask me about the Zombie Menace" (which I've since removed). As a result, I've gotten to A.) Warn more people about the incoming zombie threat, and B.) Hear personal stories about several individuals encounters (be they real or cinematic) with the undead menace. I believe that this interaction with the community makes me a better zombie hunter because I've come to know the people I'm defending and also started to understand their specific fears. To quote Martha Stewart (who probably would be a good zombie hunter, what with her custom antiqued homemade machete), "it's a good thing".

I'm not telling you this to sell my buttons, but rather encourage everyone to get in touch with their community and help prepare them for the incoming threat (an action which needs no button). A unified group of people will stand strong against the zombie menace.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Death (again)

Someone asked me today what my thoughts were on death because I appear to be obsessed with the phenomenon when it comes to my zombie work. My immediate response was something along the lines of not being obsessed with death, but maybe more with life?

I've given it some more thought, and here's what I've come up with. While becoming a zombie is a horrible way to go, the situation where your corpse suddenly is not under your control forces you to take responsibility for your death, but also the death of others. I'm not talking about killing anyone, but rather dying peacefully and honorably. It's not really a negative thing, which it might be perceived as. It comes down to making the very unselfish decision of ensuring that your corpse doesn't rise and put the lives of others in danger.

More importantly, once you accept your demise as inevitable (as it invariably is, especially in a necropalytic wasteland) it becomes non-traumatic, and in many ways, life-affirming. If anything, it causes you to appreciate the life that you have, and to protect the lives of those that you love. Like we've discussed before, fighting for your survival engenders a sense of living, which goes un appreciated in these current pre-apocalyptic times. This doesn't mean going out and placing yourself in life-threatening situations (but this is usually cited as a reason for sky-diving, bungee-jumping, etc.) but to pre-emptively make yourself aware of the inevitability of your demise, so as to savor every day for all that it is worth.