Thursday, May 31, 2007

I had a Dream...

Or maybe it was a delusion?

I dreamt that zombies were a physical impossibility. My zombie training fell by the wayside, and I lived a "normal" life. I watched crappy sitcoms, preoccupied myself with gainful employment, and went shopping... a lot. So, this is what it meant to be blissfully ignorant. Life was simple; survival was a non-issue.

"How ridiculous," I thought to myself, "How could I have ever believed in zombies... that's just silly." Distracted by modern convenience, and the pretense of logic, I willfully suspended my belief in the zombie threat. This alternate reality has been my reality for the past few weeks. I won't lie. It was nice not to be burdened with the responsibility of saving the human race from the impending zombie invasion. It was nice not to have every conversation I engaged in turn to the subject of how to destroy the reanimated brain of the living dead. And it was nice to lay about and allow my physical conditioning go to waste, eating chips and watching horrible brain-rotting television.

Luckily, I awoke from my deluded state. Almost literally.
I woke up yesterday morning, greeted by the sight of my beloved machete. In my newfound laziness, I had neglected to move it from its bedside locale. Almost instinctually, I reached out for it as I scanned my bedroom for signs of intrustion. It was then, in my semi-hazy awakened state, that I realized that this is who I am. No matter how much I deny the zombie menace in a moment of human weakness, I am a zombie hunter.

Forgive me for my denial. I have resumed my training and planning. I am once again among those who are truly alive, because of their refusal to be subsumed by the undead.


Blogger Angela said...

Ah the dream of a normal life... The trouble with being born a zombie hunter is the utter lack of outbreaks this year. *sigh* Maybe next year...

11:43 AM  

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